I’m A Victim Of Climate Change

We had a fossil fuel powered thunderstorm here today. This caused lots of branches to fall on the bike path. While riding my bike to the gym, a branch got caught in the chain and sheared off my derailleur.

ScreenHunter_1901 May. 16 21.50

I calculate that derailleur shearings are 37.2% more likely now than they were just a century ago, and will be 63.4% more likely by the year 2038.

About Tony Heller

Just having fun
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34 Responses to I’m A Victim Of Climate Change

  1. nigelf says:

    Man, that was one lucky escape from death!
    I assume you’re now going to cut your personal CO2 emissions even more now that you’ve been given another chance?

  2. Louis Hooffstetter says:


  3. Marsh says:

    Please don’t give the Alarmist’s any ammo Tony,,, they will use anything… By the way, I hope you keep the rest of the bike – better lubricated than the chain.

    • Donna K. Becker says:

      It’s “alarmists”–no apostrophe. Otherwise, you’re writing “alarmist is.”

      • Marsh says:

        Donna, In the “English” language, the apostrophe is primarily used to denote the possessive ; plural nouns both end with an s, a word expressing “ownership” of something by a “group” would end with s’s – the players’s. In this case, it is in reference to potential possession of more ammo. Maybe you’re comparing another form of English? It is a Global language / site ; we cannot blame this on Climate Change…

        • You were not showing possession. You were pluralizing. And there was no need to capitalize it.

        • Marsh says:

          Morgan Wrong , there is possessive implied but it’s also intended as a “group noun” and the Alarmist’s “can be” a capital especially following “the – noun” ; this is very basic. We can all make mistakes ; you just put your foot in it twice as much as Donna. It must be very hot where you are?

          One also has to allow, for variables in spelling and grammar that exist between say; England and the United States… So, lets get back to the real problem – that CAGW is based on fraud ; something most of us agree…

        • Ben Vorlich says:

          As with all languages English has a few oddities. The apostrophe causes huge confusion even to native speakers (those born and brought up in the UK). There is a book “Eats, Shoots and Leaves” by Lynne Truss which will help those interested.

          The apostrophe does indeed denote possession but it is also used where words are concatenated in common speech.
          I think this is the more common use, won’t for “would not” isn’t for is not, don’t for do not and so on.
          So Steve’s, Joe’s denote possession, but for words ending in “s” a second “s” is not necessary so James’ is fine but not everyone follows this rule. The boy’s football for a single boy and the boys’ football for a group of boys. It would be alarmists’ minds for the minds of all or a number of alarmists, “and the alarmists would run away wouldn’t they” when talking about all alarmists debating with a sceptic on TV. (I think)

        • Marsh says:

          Ben, that’s interesting but you didn’t address the fact Alarmist’s can also be a group noun. Not intended as a plural ;( so it works as either possessive or a group noun ).
          Yes it’s flexible ; I again verified on several sites: my original wording is appropriate.

        • janets says:

          I’m sorry Marsh, but Donna, Morgan and Ben are correct and you’re wrong about the apostrophe. If you wanted to talk about the ammo of a single alarmist, then alarmist’s ammo would be correct. If you wanted to talk about the ammo of multiple alarmists, then alarmists’ ammo would be correct. But the subject of your sentence is not ammo belonging to an alarmist. You’re talking about non-specific (“any”) ammo that currently is not in the possession of an alarmist or alarmists, and saying don’t give it to them.

          The capitalisation is less important, but, unlike German, common nouns aren’t normally capitalised in English. It implies that you’re talking about an organised group with the name Alarmist’s. (Of course, if that was the case, and the apostrophe is genuinely part of the name, then your usage was correct. However, your subsequent comments then make no sense.)

          P.S. I’m the daughter of an English teacher; the correct use of apostrophes was drummed into me from an early age 😉

        • Marsh says:

          janets , You got the key part correct : ” The capitalisation is less important, but, unlike German, common nouns aren’t normally capitalised in English. It implies that you’re talking about an organised group with the name Alarmist’s. (Of course, if that was the case, and the apostrophe is genuinely part of the name, then your usage was correct.”

          Thank you , because that’s why it was capitalised ( IPCC ) Alarmist’s and yes, when it is capitalised it denotes a group Noun! If you swap Alarmist’s with IPCC you will see clearly that it makes all the sense in the World. ( apostrophe possessive & group noun ).

          Also, Ben made some good points, in that grammar is flexible in these areas today.
          Amazing, how this has generated such a discussion, when you see thousands of major grammatical errors elsewhere; at worse this was borderline, but it checks out OK on many sites on the net… thanks.

        • Donna K. Becker says:

          Marsh, if you were correct, you forgot to specify what the Alarmist’s have/own/possess. As written, it’s a contraction, “Alarmist is.” Therefore, that part of your sentence makes no sense. Except in rare instances, plurals are not formed by adding “‘s.”

          I know the apostrolypse is not caused by climate change, but I’d like to do my part to halt this rampant abuse. There are websites devoted to this cause.

          Just because some websites are relativistic and claim that whatever is common usage is correct, doesn’t mean it’s so.

          Apostrophe misuse or abuse is far more common than not, which is distracting, to say the least.

        • Donna K. Becker says:

          For those who are interested, here’s a good link to explain proper apostrophe use:


          Or, see nearly any blog, post, sign, or advertisement for incorrect usage.

        • oldfossil says:

          While we’re on the subject of apostrophes (or should it be “while were on the subject of apostrophe’s”) can anyone explain what the heck a branch was doing riding a bike to the gym?

        • Marsh says:

          Yes oldfossil, lets not provoke all the grammar N*zis again! I believe, the branch was part of the Green movement, reacting to the derailleur of Global Warming, ( Déjà vu ).

      • Menicholas says:

        Hey, maybe we can move onto a more important subject, such as why people use such words as irregardless, and boughten?

        • Donna K. Becker says:

          Shall we add “me and” to the list? LOL!

          Meanwhile, I wish I had more of a scientific background so that I could fully comprehend what I learn here, as well as contribute constructively.

        • Marsh says:

          Perhaps Donna, you could start a feisty Revolution, to bring back American Spelling to
          match the rest of the English speaking world; instead of the Webster mess; good luck!

    • bjc70 says:

      The HEAT has burnt all the oil off the chain.

  4. Brad says:


  5. Fred says:

    I believe you just have a screw loose some where behind the wheel.

    • R. Shearer says:

      It’s “somewhere” not “some where.”

    • Billy Liar says:

      All the grammar N*zis are out today!

      • Donna K. Becker says:

        Someone has to do this dirty job! Uncorrected errors proliferate and perpetuate themselves. It seems that schools do not teach grammar these days. To do so would be racist, classist, etc.

        • Marsh says:

          Donna, are you aware that English is not an official language of the USA. Remember, this is very much a global site & your definition of grammar or even spelling maybe incorrect to that of another country. Even a choice of word, “classist” defines where you’re from;
          then again, I’m here for the AGW issues, rather than nit-picking…

        • Donna K. Becker says:

          If only the plethora of errors did not distract so much from other issues!

          Pardon me, but your relativism is showing.

  6. KTM says:

    Those fossil fuel powered thunderstorms are not to be trifled with. Count yourself lucky.

  7. Warren D. Walker says:

    You will be on a recumbent before 2038.

  8. Lance says:

    Was out riding the other day, and this guy was walking up the hill from the other direction…so I pulled over to ask if he needed a hand and his crank had busted!! Sorry bud, I don’t carry a spare crank! Thankfully, the worst I have had while cycling is flats…and the usual jerks how are head down texting or throwing water bottles at me!

  9. Andy DC says:

    I got caught out in a fossil fuel powered thunderstorm in downtown DC yesterday and got struck by evil fossil fuel powered rain drops! Were you in MD or CO when yours happened?

  10. Menicholas says:

    Maybe what is really happening is that you are a victim of “climbing chains”, as in some kid is climbing onto your bike by stepping onto the chain.
    Just an idea.

  11. Aron says:

    I’m betting on a lot more than 37.2%, since dérailleurs weren’t generally used a century ago. Invented, yes, but not in general use.

  12. dmacleo says:

    sorry, must have been me driving either my 97 crown vic or 2010 grand marquis that did it.
    but mine shift just fine so NAH NAH NAH 🙂

  13. globalcooler says:

    If you remember back to Hurricane Gloria and Bob, I was a chronic mountain biker. With these hurricanes came a lot of small twigs and they would get into the chain in front of the derailleur and wind it right off the bike. Just like yours. A quick solution involved putting a piece of .093″ 7076 solution heat treated aluminum wire in a vee attached to the chain stay with some handy dandy plastic clamps. Problem solved. Couldn’t get anyone interested in selling a $6 device that prevented them from selling $80 equipment. If you want one…Quick Kirt Brush Buster

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